Why ask Why?

A dear friend of mine, who will remain nameless, has had several life experiences in the past two months that have made me question God and my faith. And made me ask Why? She has been through the ringer and she's not out of it yet, but God's plan for her is incredible and he works in mysterious ways.

 My friend became pregnant after trying for a few years now. She is older, in her late thirties and was extremely excited about her child. Because of her age she was also apprehensive. Her timing could not have been better, her husband was leaving for deployment and would be home two months before her child was due. A week after her husband left, she called me with devastating news. She had a miscarriage. She had to have the baby removed, her body had not taken care of it for her. It was horrible. I wasn't the one carrying the child, but I was devastated for her. I shared her joy when she found out she was pregnant. I shared her pain when she wasn't. We cried for hours, we talked for hours, we asked Why God Why? Why take this baby away from this couple, why do it when her husband was half way around the world? Why did she have to break that news to him over the phone, why did she have to be alone? Why why why why why?

 I still don't know all the answers, I still don't understand fully God's plan for her. But I know this, he has one. I questioned it for weeks. I prayed about it for weeks. I was angry for weeks.

 Oh ye of little faith.

 That is my mantra. Do you have one? Whenever anything bad happens to me or is beyond my control or understanding I say to myself Oh ye of Little faith. And I feel better. When I found out Jack was going to be a boy, I also found out that we needed to do additional testing that he might have Down Syndrome. I was clearly very upset. The one thing that got me through all that was that one phrase, Oh ye of little faith. Was I going to believe an ultrasound, and a doctor over God? Was my faith so weak that I didn't think God had a plan, or that God was in control? Yes, it was that weak. But that phrase kept repeating over and over in my head as if God himself was speaking to me and he probably was. So why God why? Oh ye of Little Faith.

 On Monday night my same friend had a brain aneurism. She is in the ICU at the hospital in town, she is alive, she has no brain damage. She is well. Her husband is on his way to her now. She is under observation for several weeks but I believe she will be okay. Do you know what the Doctor told her? If she had still been pregnant she would not have survived. She would have died.

 Why ask Why?